Tuesday, September 2, 2014
How to Be Patient
I often hear people say they are not patient enough to teach or homeschool. They could NEVER do it. It's not "in" them. I'm never quite sure how to respond. Yes, patience is needed, but patience is not a gift only some of us are given. She, Patience, is in each of us, waiting (patiently in fact) for us to call upon her.
In truth, we are all teachers whether we wish to be or not, especially if we are parents. We facilitate and model; we gift to our children the ways we handle situations, speak to others, treat others. We teach our beliefs, values, how we take care of ourselves; they learn all this by watching us interact in the world.
And these are the lessons they learn the quickest.
And they are always watching.
In truth, we gift our children these lessons whether we wish to give them or not.
So, as parents we start to rethink (to be present) in what we are modeling, in how we are speaking, in what we want to be for our children. We become more present in our practices, in the words we choose, because when we don't, we witness what we hoped not to pass on.
Having patience is no different.
If we are to give patience well, it is simply about being present.
And being present means...we do one thing at a time. Put our whole self into the experience.
It means we don't allow distractions to take our attention away.
It means truly wanting to be where we are or at least with the person we're with.
It means the laundry, dishes, bills, tv shows, facebook, whatever we "could be doing" is not nearly as important as what we are doing.
Patience also asks us to problem solve. How do we figure out how to reword, rethink, redo what isn't working without giving up, giving in, or getting angry.
And she asks us, most importantly maybe, to be gentle. We will lose her. We all do. We have too many strings pulling on us and we forgot to breathe and we aren't sure what to focus on.
So we cut some strings, because we must. We are not puppets. And we try again to focus on that one person or one thing that is needing us to say, "You have my attention."
Patience, she comes, willingly, to all of us.
(a repost from my blog- www.sagetribe02.com)